#33 - John Havlicek is Frank Lapidus

Oh yeah! Two all-time greats, two unconventional beauties, two stars of a famed team, two Eastern European sounding last names. It’s all there! They’re perfect for each other. Arguably, the most important teammate of Bill Russell’s Boston Celtics who then maybe more impressively distinguished himself as a multiple time champion with the Celtics after Russell retired- John ‘Hondo’ Havlicek. I don’t even know if I need to say ‘arguably’, but whatever I like throwing in those modifiers anyway. So, Hondo is the Oceanic airlines pilot turned mercenary turned Oceanic airlines pilot yet again who is THE pilot of both THE helicopter that gets the mercs onto THE island and off of THE island, but he is THE pilot that gets THE candidates onto THE island and then later - whoever is still left alive and wants to actually leave THE island - off of THE island- Frank Lapidus. 

26,395 points is a fuck ton of points. I just want to say that. It’s not the most amount of points or anything, but that’s a fuck ton of points no matter what era you played in. Beyond averaging around 20 points for over a decade including a year where he averaged 28.9 ppg (fuck!), Havlicek was durable, was a cardio monster, was a top tier defender, and he’s really just eating up the stat chart in all categories. Hondo played with Russell, so you know he has a fuck ton of championships from that alone, but he adds two more post Russell, which is wild in general and even more so because that was also deep into his career at the 12th and 14th years of his NBA career. 8x NBA champion, 1x Finals MVP in that first championship post Russell, 5x NBA defensive first team, 3x defensive second team, and he’s even got an NCAA championship under his belt from the way way way back hot tub time machine. 

Frank? The pilot? Well, let’s just say knowing how to fly both an airplane and a helicopter and do both in such troubled situations as Lapidus find himself in, that’s an NCAA championship. He’s got NCAA championship winning knowledge of flying machines. Finals MVP? Well, that is fixing and then flying the airplane off THE island at the end of ‘Lost’. Lapidus is a major part of two teams- the goodies who join the mercs - and the ‘goodies’ are Miles, Charlotte, Faraday, and Naomi (she has the opportunity to fuck over Kate et al and doesn’t) - and he’s on the return crew to THE island where he as mentioned flies them off THE island. Championship earning performances for both teams too, which is how I think of Havlicek’s career - the Celtics with Russell and the Celtics without Russell. And the famed Havlicek inbounds steal that closed out game 7 of the Eastern Conference finals against Wilt ‘The Stilt’ and the Philly Sixers that is Lapidus getting that whirlybird off THE island and then onto the freighter and then getting that whirlybird back up and off the freighter as the freighter EXPLODED and then he gets the helicopter to international safety from THE island for a period of time. 

Fuck styles? I mentioned unconventional beauties before and really they’re both kind of just a couple of good looking boys. I think ‘beauties’ is a bit much for them, but Lapidus aka Jeff Fahey has those steely blue eyes and as Lapidus he is making all sorts of decisions showing off his chest hair, which is not something I think of with a ‘beauty’, so an unconventional beauty for sure. Hondo is really just a hunk. He’s 6’5”, he’s a pure athlete (was fucking drafted to the NFL as well as the NBA), and he’s got just this pleasing, smooth skinned, All American boy look. So, I think they’d charm you, disarm you, and 69 you. I think that rhymes and I think that’s what it’s about. Charm, disarm, sixty-narm. What rhymes better?! I think it works. I feel like maybe you’re out and about and in a world not ravaged by a contagious disease and you see Havlicek or Lapidus and they want to buy you a drink. Maybe they’re not exactly what you’d picture when you went out that night, but they’re friendly and it isn’t difficult to think they’re handsome and, honestly, cute too. You find yourself feeling forward and you’re like let’s go, just go somewhere not crowded and try this out. And they’re game for it and they don’t make you feel silly for saying that and you don’t feel like they’re skeevy in that they’re so into the idea, they’re just comfortably cool about the whole thing. Later, after you’ve 69ed, you’re just like that was fun and I’m glad this happened and I didn’t feel rushed or don’t feel like I need to rush to get out of here. Just a smooth take off, smooth landing, no turbulence, a real quality experience that involved a 69.